While shopping in the produce aisle at our local grocery store, a sweet old woman squeezed passed us to scoop up a handful of green beans and plop them into her plastic sack. She was a little hunched, her features defined and pointed from age, and there may or may not have been a large mole dangling from her chin. I won't comment on the likelyhood of hairs sprouting from the alleged mole, but sufficeth to say I can understand where Reese was coming from when she screamed, in a voice of sheer delight the whole world could hear,
"Mommy, it's a WITCH!"
What to do, what to do.
How was I going to explain to this poor woman that in Reese-speak this was the ultimate compliment?! We watch Sleeping Beauty and the Frog Princess not for pretty girls and dresses, but the dragon and a freaky voodoo man! Despite my repeated attempts to change her mind, Disney villains remain the folks she loves and looks up to the very most; they laugh so much and seem to be having such a great time, how could anyone not want to hang with them? They're the real popular crowd, though momentarily misunderstood. I think she's decided that what they really need is a good friend. I know, I know. Very foreboding for the teenage years.
Anyway, maybe it's because this has happened before and I try to learn from my mistakes, but I could see just how badly this explanation could go and decided it was far better to back away from the spinach and make a run for it. Even if the poor woman did buy it, managing to not take offense at being mistaken for an evil hag, I didn't want to be that mom, the one who fed her child a steady diet of cackles and deception. So I ran away- I'm not really the confrontational type.
Besides, I'd rather eat frozen peas for dinner anyway.
4 comments:
LOL! good heavens molly! let me catch my breath here... SO FUNNY! Man Reese is just a hoot! not to mention that your writing style is a real gem - a GEM.
love you, thanks for the guffaws, it's been a long day. :)
She KILLS me.... lately I've been spending my lunch time reading blogs... and this has made my day. Thanks for the delightful post!
This is awesome! Reese is a crack-up! I think I would have done the same thing you did, which was making a good run for it.
This post made my day!
You crack me up! Despite the fact that you may not know who I am talking about...I encourage you to keep on writing about your everyday adventures, because you are definatly the Erma Bombeck of the 21st Century! (One of my mom's favorite writers:)
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