When I first arrived on my mission to Paris, France this was the big, bold headline printed across my mind. It seemed the perfect title for my 'memoirs' should I write it all in story form and someday have them published. It would be a hoot- so many hilarious, embarrassing, and awkward moments of an optimistic small town girl thrown into the mix of a foreign metropolis.
Anyway, since then, the same headline pops up whenever I'm feeling particularly out of my element. Accepting my latest calling in church bumped the font up several sizes and even had the editor considering changing what is normally a bold, news print to a full-fledged neon sign complete with animated nun jumping up and down beside it.
I am the new Relief Society pianist.
Sakes alive, I get so nervous playing in front of people I'm hit with a sudden, stress-induced bout of paralysis rendering me temporarily blind. "I can't see, Pa! I can't see!" This last week was particularly bad. So much so that I found myself, between the practice hymn and the closing, mentally listing off all the things I'd rather be doing than preparing to butcher "All Creatures of Our God and King". Here's a snippet--
I'd rather compete on Hell's Kitchen, complete with getting royally chewed out by Gordon himself. . .
Skydive (if you know my fear of heights, you'll fully comprehend). . .
Host my own show on the Food Network for the first time with only a few of my needed ingredients, half-dressed, and broccoli in my teeth. . .
I'd rather swim with whales. . . well, maybe not. Nothing is that bad.
Anyway, that's where the daydreaming stopped, because it was time to kill yet another beloved LDS favorite. Sigh. Heaven help me.
Total Eclipse!
3 weeks ago
5 comments:
I so had that calling for 2 years...and only slightly got marginally better by the end. I would sit there inbetween songs and go, "sorry ladies, another awful one today." And then proceed to chop up the once beautiful song.
haha! oh goodness! I guess it makes my sunbeam calling look like a complete cinch! I don't know what I'd do if I had to play while people were singing, you're an inspiration to all of us :)
I have faith in you, Monique Pommier! Next time you have a moment of mental alternatives, think about Justin Jaynes playing "Alouette" in French class. Remember how he was clapping out of rhythm, and Mme. Hillier was telling us 'not to look at him'? Good times, good times.
You will be great in your new calling!
Oh, bless your heart! I actually turned down the calling to be Primary Pianist when I was about your age and even suggested to the Bishop that perhaps he ment Chorister, because my playing would send everyone running the other way. He pondered and called me to be chorister instead...MY FAVORITE calling!!! YOu will be blessed because you said yes, and you could also get the simplified hymns and no one would know the difference!!! :)
wanna know something funny? I HAVE the simplified (the ones in the orange book- not the really really simplified ones), and I'm still having issues. :)
I may have to suck up my pride, though, and get the oh-so-simplified book soon!
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